Village Overrun by Wild Animals

Kirby, AZ was empty this morning after the rampage of the chinchillas.

The first chinchillas hopped their way into Kirby at about 7PM last night. Many citizens of Kirby thought they were cute.

"How could I be afraid of a little ball of fur," asked resident James Fred. "We were eating dinner when we spotted a couple of [chinchillas] that had snuck into the house. Within a few minutes, we had hundreds of them running around the house and terrorizing the children. It wasn't long before they had eaten all of our raisins and left us for dead." Fred and his family had quickly packed up and left as soon as they could.

By 9PM, hundreds of residents of Kirby were jamming the streets, frantically trying to escape the chinchilla menace.

"It was like the 'Trouble with Tribbles' episode of Star Trek," explained Janice Franklin. "Only it was in our town and not on the Enterprise. Oh, and I don't think the tribbles liked raisins quite as much."

Chinchillus Terribilus

Kirby law enforcement officials gave up at around 11PM, and by midnight Kirby was a ghost town.

"I don't think I could ever go back there," Franklin stated. Franklin, who was born in Kirby, expressed doubt in the town's ability to ever recover from the tragedy.

Though there were no firsthand accounts, some believe that the chinchillas had left by morning. There were no injuries or fatalities in the attack.